Article by Juliette @_runbroken_ – Atlas Events Ambassador
The course of my life was irrevocably thrown off course in late 2020 after a series of near-death experiences, losing most of my digestive system, spending 6 months straight in hospital, and many many months thereafter on a journey of recovery and re-defining myself in a context of serious ongoing medical issues and relying on a feeding tube placed directly into my stomach through the skin for nutrition.
Stripped of almost every important role in my life and being reduced to that of 'patient' or 'bed number 20', I was given the opportunity and time to think about who I wanted to be, what I wanted from life, and to reset some priorities.
I spent significant time feeling like I was at war with a body that caused (and continues to cause) me so much pain. A dear childhood friend, Bec, encouraged me to enter a 5km fun run in July 2023 while she ran a half marathon.
My doctors and treating team had reservations about the wisdom of this plan, and of course their hesitancy made me more determined than ever to give it a try! To be fair, they too demonstrated courage through their willingness to support me to give it a go and to actively help me minimise risks to the extent possible.
Amid the medical drama, this is a story of friendship too. Sometimes the best thing you can do for a friend is talk them into entering a random running race, enthusiastically cheer them to the finish line you always knew they could cross, and watch the course of their lives change for the better.
I will never forget that race day. We were all being called 'athletes' over the loudspeaker as we were lining up in our respective starting zones, and that day, I replaced 'patient' with 'runner', and it stuck.
The single minded joy of putting one foot in front of the other to achieve a goal, and working WITH my broken body to get across that finish line in a time of 38:41 was an amazing feeling. I joined Parkrun the week after, and achieved 10 PBs in 15 ParkRuns (my 5km PB is now 23:29).
I was the second woman across the line at Brisbane's RiverRun 5km, finished in the top 5% of all women at the Bridge to Brisbane 10km (a time of 51:35), and I won a gold medal at the Maryborough Master's Games 5km event last month in my regional home town.
What made the Bridge to Brisbane especially memorable was that I was able to keep the Royal Brisbane and Women's Hospital in view on the horizon while I ran throughout much of the course.
There was a time, not long ago, when I wasn't expected to leave that building alive. Running, and feeling strong and alive, while I kept my eye on the helipad where I had landed in such critical condition and the 9th floor of the building I called home for many months, was an incredibly powerful experience.
I am fuelled by tube-feeds, chocolate, and the sheer joy of running, but I also love accumulating medal bling and proving to myself and everyone who cares that my body can do something no one thought it could.
The mind is an incredibly powerful thing when you use it to harness the inherent capabilities of your amazing human body! This is why I run! It repeatedly reminds me I am not completely broken despite the daily challenges of managing a complex health condition and tube-feeding.
Through running I have learned that I am tenacious and strong and sometimes I am fast! When I run, my PTSD and self-doubt are quiet. My body and I call a truce while we work together to get across the finish line. Nothing feels better than this.
I want to run my first half marathon in April, then another in May, to prepare to run my first full marathon in July 2024. Other than this, I plan to get involved in as many running events as possible.
I’m planning on doing either the half or the 10km at the Brisbane Marathon Festival in June, and the Sunshine Coast Half Marathon in August. If I can get the funds together to travel to the Hobart Airport Marathon Festival and the 7 Cairns Marathon Festival, I would love to tackle these events too.
2024 will be a pivotal year in my running journey as it will be the year my treating medical team and I will have to problem solve and trouble-shoot a range of challenges related to being a tube-fed runner.
Maintaining nutritional stability, keeping my electrolytes in check and finding the best logistical and equipment solutions to carrying a feeding pump and feeds with me while running longer distances are key goals for me.
Determination, persistence, and a sprinkle of delusion are the secret ingredients to winning the mental game of enduring hard things! Don't lose yourself in adversity - use it to find yourself!
